Anthony Mayer ;  alternative history ;  Sydney Webb's Thou Art Only Born Again Once - Part 1
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Part 0

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Thou Art Only Born Again Once

Part 1

"So you wish me to stop the weapons being passed to the Irish terrorizers, your grace?" asked Sir Thomas More, England's National Enquirer.

"Not Munster, Münster. In Germany. Now pay attention, Sir Thomas," said Cardinal Wolsey in schoolmasterly tones.

But it was hard to pay attention to what the Lord Chancellor was saying. It was a warm summer's day and golden light was streaming through the open windows of Hampton Court. King Henry, who was to have also been present at this meeting, had tendered his apologies from Surrey. More imagined the King in Nonsuch palace, pacing up and down awaiting Mistress Anne to be delivered of her labours. The King was as anxious as a virgin father-to-be although in truth this was not his first bastard, the Duke of Richmond now being on the verge of manhood.

Wolsey continued, "Emperor Charles of the Holy Roman Emperor has quashed all the revolts in Germany and now his armies fight in Italy."

"With his gallant English allies by his side?" prompted More.

"A token force," conceded the cardinal, "Britain is a sea power and we keep the bulk of our forces at home, least we face a surprise invasion by the diabolical French. But we still honour our side of the alliance."

Was it only a year ago, wondered More, When King Francis aided us in our crusade against the heresiarch John Calvin? But it was not heresy that Emperor Charles hunted now but treasure and land in the north of Italy. The King of England had decided he had to take sides, and the Emperor seemed the safer bet. England - 'perfidious Albion' as Paris now called her - fell easily into a traditional enmity and Henry VIII fancied himself as a new Henry V. But this was politics. More did not question. He was a loyal servant of the Crown.

"The Emperor has quashed all the revolts in Germany," Wolsey repeated by way of emphasis, before correcting himself, "All? Did I say, 'All'? Nay, one town holds out. Alone it stands. Münster.

"A revolt? But is this not just a problem for the Holy Roman Emperor, your grace?" asked More.

"It might be, Sir Thomas, if Charles' full attention was at home. But a small city, with an unorthodox town council, that otherwise does not cause trouble in a time of war, that is something His Imperial Majesty is inclined to overlook."

"You said the word 'unorthodox', your grace. I take it this is something the Church cannot overlook."

"Very perceptive, Sir Thomas. The heresy afflicting Münster is even worse than that you faced last year."

Worse than Calvinism! More was struck with horrified surprise. "Your grace, What could be worse than denying the grace bestowed by the sacrifice of the mass?"

"Denying the soterial efficacy of the primary sacrament - holy baptism," the papal legate announced sternly. He clarified, "Oh, they still practice baptism. But they deny any baptism they do not perform themselves. They are, for want of a better term, anabaptists."

Wonderingly, More asked, "So that someone joining their cult would have to be born again, again, your grace?"

"Don't be foolish, More," snapped the cardinal, "Their baptism is an impious mockery and devoid of merit. Thou art only born again once."

The cardinal continued, "The anabaptists have other pernicious habits also. Polygamy and the holding of goods in common. But that is not important right now."

Not important! Multiple marriages and holding goods in common! As a lawyer, More knew these were wrong. But he said nothing, instead nodding. That was the politics and the religion out of the way. Now for the interesting details.

"Sir Thomas, while the Emperor could ignore Münster the Dominicans could not. They sent a force to convert the city. They were armed for any eventuality, or so they thought." Wolsey rang a bell. In less than a minute the familiar, bearded, balding figure of Father Leo entered the room. The inventor displayed a metal device, almost two feet in length.

"It is a hand-cannon," explained Father Leo, "A copy I have made from the one recovered from the Battle of Münster. The black-robes fell to the men of Münster with few survivors and just one trophy. The garrottes of the monks were no match for these ingenious devices."

"Ingenious?" asked More.

"Si!" confirmed Father Leo, "Until now the most sophisticated fire-arm a single man could carry would be the wheel-lock harquebus. And that is such an expensive piece you would purpose build it for a single man. If you want to arm a company, it would be cheaper and just as efficient to arm them with long-bows.

"But this item, it is clever. Faster to load, more accurate and with a longer range than an harquebus. The rifling in the barrel, it is very clever. The ball, well I call it a ball, is spun and diverges less than an ordinary ball on a long flight. Yet I built this hand-cannon in half the time it would take me to make an harquebus. So the hand-cannon is cheap, and yet not so cheap, you know?"

"And I suppose, Father Leo, that there are craftsmen in Münster turning out these hand-cannon?" asked More.

"Ho-ho-ho, Sir Thomas, it is to laugh. A little, how you say? unprepossessing town like Münster producing these things! No, these have been made by master metallurgists and craftsmen elsewhere in the Empire."

"And smuggled in to Münster," continued Wolsey, "Which is where we began. I want you to get kitted out by Father Leo and travel to the Spanish Netherlands where you will meet a companion. You will then cross the border into Westphalia. Enter Münster if you must but your primary mission is to find out who is manufacturing these destructive weapons and stop them. You companion will deal with the heretics."

"Thank you, your grace." Sir Thomas said. "And might I ask who my companion will be?"

"You may," smiled the cardinal indulgently, "Brother Felix of Barcelona."

Sir Thomas More smiled to as he thought to himself, Well, hurrah!

[To be continued]


Last modified: Fri May 16 09:47:49 BST 2003